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Why does my toddler hate me?

We seemed fine yesterday…

Angry toddler photo.

Let’s start with a few quotes from my lovely daughter:

No! Don’t like Daddy!

Go away Daddy!

Mummmmyyyyy!

All usually accompanied by an arm gesture, either like swatting away a fly, or a gentle hitting action. I think she knows hitting is wrong so doesn’t do it with any gusto, more a gentle push…but I’m not in range to push.

Anyway…

It is a fairly recent phenomenon and I’m not sure how to take it. For the time being, I’m not taking it personally. I get frustrated too sometimes and want some alone time, maybe she is feeling the same way and just wants to relax for a while.

I take comfort in the fact that some days she’ll love me and follow me around wanting to play or sing with her. But why am I her arch enemy on other days?

I think she is at an age where things are starting to make more sense to her (she’s just over 2 years old), she has her own thoughts and desires and can understand a lot of what we can say to her. But she isn’t able to express herself, and we can never understand what she is trying to say! If I was in her shoes I’d be incredibly frustrated.

Why me and not Mum?

So why does she seem to mostly get angry at me? Mum has always had the stronger bond, there are plenty of reasons why that is the case that I have come to accept. When she wants comfort she tends to go to Mum and I don’t think that will change, including when she is just frustrated with the world.

I also have to admit I joke around with her quite a bit, potentially to the point where my magic tricks are beginning to get annoying. Maybe I’m embarrassing her in front of her friends. Who knows?

I’m encouraged by the fact that she does seem to get over it fairly quickly, and still comes to me when she wants to race or spin in the laundry basket. Today she had a turn at being angry at Mummy which was a little bit sad but made me smile just a little bit too 😛

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